The Common Denominator

This is something I’ve always simply assumed (and yes, I know the definition of assume) everybody thought this way, the statement “if everyone around is wrong, you might want to look within” is a given!  Let’s back up just a little, and let me tell you where this started.

I have coached and trained automotive professionals for about 18 years now, and one of the issues I occasionally run into is one person dictating how everyone around them should do things.  These are usually people who use the old size 12 method of working (controlling) with people, you know, “do it or I’ll bury my foot up your”……well you get the point.  What I have also noted when working or simply observing these personality types, is that they are never wrong.  Come on, we’ve all experienced these people at some point in our lives!  

Anyway, I wanted to bring a observation to the table here; in general, You can’t possibly always be right!  If you stop and look at the last week of your life, look at how many times you made decisions for the “less informed”, and were right (again & still), this article may be for you.  If you simply stop and think for one minute about always being right, you should realize that this is a statistical impossibility, and yet you believe you are, right?  Logic dictates it simply can’t happen.  If you tend to scream or bark out your wants (orders) instead of actually thinking about how to motivate your family, employees or sub-servants this article may be for you. Come on you know the type, the one who everyone avoids upsetting during family gatherings or the one person at work that you will walk the long way around to avoid coming into contact with.  We’ve all seen and dealt with them.  Who are these people and how is this even possible in today’s society?  

There may be many technical terms for them, but the most common is Narcissism! As defined by Google; PSYCHOLOGY Narcissism is “extreme selfishness, with a grandiose view of one's own talents and a craving for admiration, as characterizing a personality type”.  Most Narcissists believe they are always right, always better and definitely smarter than everyone in their proximity.  They generally place themselves in leadership roles or positions because (by their thinking) it is the only way anyone can get things done, and they are generally the loud ones when controlling people.  Narcissists place great emphasis on making sure everyone acknowledges that they are right and even when proven wrong, they remain steadfast that they are still right!  They will start fights to prove their superiority and sever long personal ties with anyone who challenges them with any consistency…..we’ve all seen it!

So, what does this have to do with the, “common denominator” you ask?  If you find yourself fighting for something you believe is right and everyone around is saying you are not, or if people (employees, friends or relatives) are leaving you and your space, you should always start by asking yourself, “what is the common denominator in these relationships?”  And believe or not, if the answer is you, maybe you need to rethink your position, your life, and truly look at what the real problem is instead of blaming everyone else for your failures.  The common denominator theory will always point to the real reason for failure(s).  Is it you??

If you need help with your business and want to see and feel the successes you expected when you opened your doors, give us a call at: The ACT Group, 805-444-2598 or visit our website for more information